Sunday, February 22, 2009

the last two weeks

I've been MIA, I know. I'm sure it's to be expected with two kiddos to care for now. These last two weeks have been more difficult to date, with Curren having rough periods of sleep during the day (sometimes napping in 10 or 20 minute increments...what the heck!?) and not really going more than 3 hours between feedings at night. Maggie has been getting up most mornigs between 6-6:30am which is a most ungodly hour, considering we don't normally start our days prior to 7am. And this weekend she has battled strep throat and a double ear infection. She was up about 4 times last night and of course, it was the night of Curren's longest stretch between feedings, 4 1/2 hours. Oh, the irony! And on top if it all, I seem to have a cold and don't feel too well. These last 7-14 days have felt like those first few weeks of Maggie's life where we were severly sleep deprived and for me, the world looked quite bleak. I've cried more and felt more alone. And Aron's work has been extremely busy lately, so most days he is gone from 6am-7pm. I'm thankful these times have hit when Curren is almost 6 weeks old because we really did have some joy-filled days those first few weeks and it's good to know that we will get back there.

But, I've been having trouble finding joy lately as my children are not sleeping or feeling well. Being a parent is so much more refining than I ever thought possible; I'm so selfish and want what I want, when I want it. And that's not always how things work. Sigh. It's at times like these that I miss my family terribly. Thankfully, they are coming out in a few short weeks! Hooray! And Aron's mom came for a quick visit over President's Day weekend (and we were able to get out for a date), for which we are grateful. We enjoyed some good downtime with her, ate out a couple of times, and just relaxed. Below are a few pics of her time here.

We are also trying to work through some possible life-changing decisions (more later) and that adds to the stress of life currently. He recently stepped down from his position as Customer Service Manager in his job to focus on special projects, in hopes of easing his tremendously hectic workload so he can focus full-time on school come fall. There is much uncertainty for us right now and I'm praying and trying desperately to see what God has for us. For now, all I can do it take it day by day, sometimes hour by hour. And cling to the good things that happen on a daily basis, even if they are few and far between.


  1. Oh friend, you have so much on your plate right now and that doesn't even begin to account for new baby C. Hang in there. You are through the hardest part and I hope you can just do whatever you need to be rested and sane. :)

    I love you.

  2. Suz, I so understand the refining nature of parenting is so very hard, especially when you just want sleep. Hugs. We, too, are also processing the next huge life changing chapter and adding little ones to that makes life quite stressful. I'm encouraged by your attitude and trying to keep things in godly perspective.

  3. Hey friend, I'm praying for you. I remember how hard 1 infant was, I can only imagine how difficult 1 infant and 1 toddler are. Praying for a healthy bodies all around and that you all get back on some sort of routine (if such a thing exists!) HUGS!

  4. hey friend. was wondering how things were with you, since it's been a bit quiet. oh, girl i feel for you. so true how refining p-hood is, which is a blessing, bearing such great fruit, but so hard at the same time. i was so shocked by the difficulty of it when owen came along...but you can do it b/c God has called you to it! He is with you to help, even though it seems so bleak and tiring. (i used to repeat that when i'd wake up again & again w/ fussy O...'this is God's will for me') REST as much as you can...since you're sick and the littles aren't sleeping so hot. that is SO hard when they aren't sleeping:( praying for you now. much love. xo

  5. Hang in there sweet thing! You'll get through it! We all do... though it seems like it's never going to end at the moment we are going through it, does it? ;) Everyone has these tough times, and clinging to the Lord is just what we all need. i am praying for you Suz! You'll get through it... looking forward to hearing about the life changing things! I can not believe Curren is already 6 weeks old! It just doesn't seem possible!

  6. Lack of sleep just makes everything else seem 100 times harder!

    I appreciate your candid thoughts and know just where you're coming from.