Babies come into your life and upset everything--in both good and bad ways. Good, in that here is this new little person who is part of your family, who will forever change how you do life, how you think and live. And bad--a better word is challening--in that you have to learn to adjust to life with another little person around. You no longer get the sleep you used to get, you have to plan to get out of the house that much earlier because it's going to take you that much longer to get ready, and well, you fill in the blanks.
I've made it through two weeks alone with my kiddos and surprisingly, it went much more smoothly than I expected. I took it easy, didn't have much of an agenda, and tried to rest when I could. I've determined that the most difficult time of day for me is about 7am (or whenever Maggie wakes up) and then between 7-9pm, give or take, before Curren's last night feeding before the middle of the night feedings start. He is only waking up an average of 2 times in the night, so I feel these feedings go rather smoothly, unless he wants to stay awake for an hour and a half (which has happened a couple times). I have had my moments of tears and breakdowns, but they have been minimal. I have to wonder what exactly that means, though. Are there worse ones coming? Undoubtedly. Yet, it's all about taking things one day at a time and relishing both the good and challening times.
I must share that I have enjoyed this era of babyhood much more than I did with Maggie. I feel more relaxed, more at ease. Curren really is extremely mellow. I can remember counting down the weeks to 6 when fussies were supposed to "peak" when Maggie was this age. Curren just isn't fussy. I love when he sleeps on me or with me (we have brought him into bed with us a few times; I'm mastering the nursing laying down), and I love to cradle him in my arms and take in all his sweet features. I can remember my friend Patti telling me this age is one of her favorites and me thinking she was CRAZY because having a newborn is downright difficult. But, perhaps my experiences are being challenged because I don't feel this way right now. I'm enjoying life overall with two bambinos. I hope that is encouraging to my friends who are about to embark on the journey with two. You can't prepare for this, but I did hear from many of my mom friends that transitioning from 1 to 2 kiddos is the most diffcult of all. I'm not sure I would say that.
Several things I'm currently proud of:
--I've successfully breastfed in public--at a park, at a gymnastics gym, a restaurant, and in the car.
--I've taken both kids out, including a shopping trip to Old Navy.
--I've put Maggie to bed, read her books, played with her, given her a bath, fixed her meals, disciplined her, all *while* breastfeeding Curren--I feel I've climbed a 14-footer for what this accomplishment is worth. :)
--I don't loathe middle of the night feedings like I did with Maggie. Call me crazy.
Now, it's learning to master my time, time in the Word, time to organize the house, cook, and connect with Aron. It will all fall into place slowly, I know it will. For now, our new normal is being defined and I'm taking it in stride.