Thursday, April 16, 2009
one of "those" days
I just need to get some thoughts down on paper, so to speak, and just be honest that it has been one of those days, really one of those weeks. Parenting my toddler has been challenging, she's fought me on several naps this week, only to end up a total crab apple by 5pm. Both my kiddos are fighting either allergies, a bronchial infection (Curren), constant runny noses, etc. Dear God. A lack of sleep is rearing it's ugly head once again and honestly, I have *no idea* why I think I can nap when both kids nap because the last 3 weeks have seen one or both of them waking up JUST as I'm falling asleep. I'm trying to see the joy in this, but can't really. Yesterday, I drove to IKEA, only to learn, after being assured that the product was in stock, that it wasn't. Off to Target to buy a what I needed, only to loose one of Maggie's shoes in the store (my favorite ones). Sigh. I bought myself a mocha frappucino. I prayed and asked God for patience and a nearness of His presence. But, really, the frap made me feel better. I'm ashamed to admit it. I often make a fresh pot of coffee in the afternoon to make me feel better. How often do a turn to the tangible to bring me some sense of comfort, peace, or fulfillment? When everything else is falling apart around me, I try to make myself feel better through other means, rather than seeking first His face and heart for me in these trying times. As I type this, my husband is at class, my son is screaming from his room (he's beyond over-tired), my house completely blew up on me, my daughter is crying on and off, and I'm tempted to bury my frustration in a bag of M&Ms. And yet I know I need to read the Word. I hope the latter wins out.